And just like that, the holiday season is over.
Yesterday I felt an overwhelming sadness as I was erasing the month of December from my dry erase calendar that hangs in our kitchen. I wiped away Marlo's birthday (marked with balloons), my birthday (marked with a glass of champagne, of course), our trip to Disney, our trip to Florida, the presents I drew on Christmas day, and the fireworks I drew on New Year's Eve. I changed the month to January, wrote in the days on each square and then I stopped - I had nothing to actually put on the calendar for the month of January. So as I type at my desk I now look up at the blank calendar on the wall above me and sigh. Man, I miss the holidays.
If January had theme music it would be something like "waaaahhhh wooooohhhh" that terrible horn sound that you get when you don't get the price right on The Price is Right. December's sound is all babies laughing and people smiling and piano's playing and bells ringing and glasses clinking. And then January 2nd comes (January 1st is still technically the holidays so I don't count that day) and everything comes to a screeching halt.
Gone is the holiday music on the radio (I love it, you might not, but I do.) No more presents to buy, no more presents to unwrap. No more holiday parties, and family dinners. There is nothing to be excited for - literally nothing, as my blank calendar reminds me every time I glance up. Damn you blank calendar!!!
At this time every year I plan to get back into shape. Well, not last year as I was happily eating my way through the pantry as I was preggers - damn you Me of 2012!! If it wasn't for you I wouldn't have to go on another diet - Blurg! So today I put on my workout clothes, got my sweat on (for the first time in a year that wasn't weather induced), and ate my kids size Chobani yogurt for breakfast. I spent the following 5 hours starving and feeling like I was drowning myself as I drank more water than I have in years (slight exaggeration of course).
But it's January again, and why not start the year off right by trying to get my fat ass back in shape. No more handfull of Macadamia nuts (damn are those babies delish), no more finishing off Marlo's mac and cheese after she eats only two bites of it at dinner, no more sitting on the couch with a bag of Pirate's Booty shoveling those cheesy treasures into my mouth, and then wiping my hand on my babies burp cloth (no wonder she smells like cheese sometimes.)
New year, and the start of trying to be a new me - again. But like Jessie says in her great post below, none of my resolutions have anything to do with my kids because I too think I am being the best mom I can be. And I have some awesome kids to remind me that I am not doing such a bad job at this Mama thing.
Now it is time to take a little better care of myself for a change. So be prepared for some angry posts in the next few days/weeks because I am going to be one hungry mother!