Mama J's 25 bits of advice for daughters (and some for sons too)

This past week I saw a bunch of people post links on Facebook to posts on parenting blogs (some serious, some jokes) about "rules" for parents of daughters and sons. Then there was the "rules for dads of daughters" and someone brought back the classic Tina Fey "prayer for her daughter." So I figured I would do a post in the same vein as these other posts, but with my own spin on it...using my mistakes to prevent my daughter from future embarrassment and regret - or as I like to call them "moments of my life that give me the icks when I think about them."

So here goes...Mama J's advice for daughter's (and some apply to sons too) everywhere:

1. Don't drink Long Island Ice Teas. Nothing good will happen if you do. When I first started drinking at bars in college I had no idea what to order. I had had a few beers and wine coolers in my day, but never a cocktail, so I ordered what I had heard of...a Long Island Iced Tea. They are a disgusting tasting drink composed of like 7 different liquors which should never be in the same glass together, with a splash of Coke. They give you a terrible hangover, after what will most likely be a night you will regret. Stay away from them all together...which leads me to my next bit of advice...

2. Pace yourself when you drink. It takes a few minutes for alcohol to kick in, so don't just keep drinking because you don't feel anything. It will come. It is ok to enjoy a few cocktails, just don't be that girl who gets sloppy drunk and does things she regrets in the morning!

this looks better than my hair did

3. Don't dye your hair blond at home. You will never have hair the color of the person's on the box. Especially if you start with brown hair. It will turn out school bus yellow, after burning the crap out of your scalp for 15 minutes. If you must, have it done professionally, but remember it costs money to maintain. Stay brunette if you are brunette.

4. Don't let anyone touch you that you don't want touching you. You are no one's property, no one has the right to hurt you. If you are uncomfortable in a situation, get out of it quick. If it is a boyfriend that is doing this to you, he doesn't love you...get out of it quick.

5. Don't be afraid to speak up in class. I was petrified to speak up in class in college. The classes were big, the teachers intimidating, but that didn't mean I didn't know the answers 90% of the time. And because I wouldn't speak up I would always get called on when I didn't know the answer. If you know the answer - speak up! If you have a question - speak up! Let your voice be heard.

NOT OK

6. Always wear a bra. Unless you are basically flat chested, there is no excuse not to wear a bra (and daughter of mine, you will not be flat chested if dna has anything to do with boob size). Tank tops with a "built in shelf bra" do not count as bras. I went through the warm months of college wearing these hideous things, and every photo I have of myself my boobs are the first thing I notice. Not good. Wear a bra. The only people you are attracting when you don't are crazy horny boys. They will be looking bra or not, so don't give them an excuse to stare!

7. Be nice to everyone. This one is pretty self explanatory. I was the type of person that was friends with everyone in high school and college. You never know how people's lives are going to turn out, just be friendly to everyone. Never make fun of anyone's physical appearance or behaviors. There is always something on you that they could make fun of right back, so just be nice!