Damn, Kids Are Resilient!

This past Sunday started out like every other Sunday in Mama J's household. Dada J was out walking the pooch, Mama J was getting M presentable for our weekend brunch reservations, and then starting to get herself presentable for the public eye. (Switch to first person...!)

After I showered and donned my finest white terrycloth robe (that I think has been washed twice in the last 10 years) I had decided that M had watched enough TV already for one morning so we needed to go downstairs and play, and I would finish getting ready when Papa J was home. As soon as we stepped off the stairs she took off running, which is what she always does these days - running around the first floor like it is a race track. I let her go, as she obviously had some energy to burn, and sat at my computer to check email.

Well 1 minute later I see her face plant on the hardwood floor out of the corner of my eye. I immediately knew she had done some damage, as she was running as fast as she could, didn't put her hands out to break her fall, and the noise of the fall made my spine tingle. I ran to her immediately, and all hell broke loose.

She had broken her fall with her nose and mouth - and there was blood everywhere. There was a puddle under her face already when I picked her up screaming. I immediately brought her to the kitchen island and grabbed the nearest dish towel to try and stop the bleeding. It was coming from her nose and from her mouth as far as I could tell, so the first thing I did was check to see if all her teeth were still there - check!

A fall from Grace

Last week, my daughter S fell off the bed. She is 16 months old and is generally very adept at getting on and off the bed. My husband and I left her unattended for just a moment and she tripped (we think) and fell. And she was knocked unconscious.

It was the scariest thing I've ever experienced in my life. My husband ran down the hallway with her limp body in his arms (she was out for about 15 seconds) screaming her name. I was in the bathroom with the door shut (a rare occurrence). I wasn't sure what was happening - it sounded like he was chasing her down the hallway or playing. When I opened the door he was standing there with her in his arms. She was not moving or responding.

We ran down the stairs to our neighbor and friend, a NICU nurse, who came charging out of the shower. We thrust our daughter into her arms, willing her to wake up. She came to, but was definitely groggy and rattled.

After a frantic call to the pediatrician, we got in the car to go to Children's Hospital. I sat in the back with her intent on keeping her awake. We made it there, and after many hours, we were able to get a successful and clear CT scan that declared S was fine.

Throughout the day, I was racked with emotions - guilt, pain, love, frustration, anger. How could this have happened? Why did it happened? What if something is permanently wrong? It's not fair, we're good parents. We love our daughter.

One of our doctors (who was also a mother) took me aside and told me to hang in there and not beat myself up. It was an accident and with children, they happen. We can do everything in our power to try to stop them, but we can't. We just need to be careful, do our best and have faith in them.

I'm writing this publicly because while I never, ever want my daughter (or anyone's child) to go through this type of physical (and emotional) pain, I'm sure we will again. She has an amazingly fearless streak in her (one doctor described her as having "verve") so I know there will be other times.
But this accident is exactly that - an accident. We need to be careful and not put her in danger, but we are not bad parents. We maybe had an overconfidence as to her abilities, but that doesn't make us bad. And as parents (and even more specifically, mothers) we have to stop beating ourselves up for not being "perfect."

Here's to health and happiness.

Can't Live Without: Month One of Motherhood

As I was getting ready for bed tonight, I was frantically searching through a pile of clean laundry (that was on my not so clean floor waiting to be folded and at some point put away) for one of my Medela Nursing Sleep Bras. Due to the ginormous size of my boobs, and the over abundance of milk I produce (I am talking I could feed the entire Gosselin clan with these puppies), I have to keep them on lock down when I sleep at night, and the only thing I have found to be comfortable are the Medela sleep bras. After finding one that had become attached to the velcro tab of one of Marlo's sleepsacks, I thought to myself how I have come to rely on certain items the past 4 weeks and this led me to this post. I figured I should share with my other Mamas out there the things that I have found that I cant live without anymore (no longer is it my 5 inch Michael Kors heels and evening glass of red wine - ah how times have changed) in no particular order I should add:

1. Medela Sleep Bras: I mentioned it before, but I feel like I need to say it again - my boobs are huge. I can pump 2-3 ounces out of each boob every 3 hours, if that gives you any idea as to my milk production. But with this bountiful supply comes bountiful bosoms. BB (before baby) I liked my 36 small D boobs, and I liked to free them from their underwire cages when I went to bed at night. Those days are gone. Not only do I need something to put my breast pads (so that I don't leak through to my shirt) in, but I need something to keep them supported because otherwise I am in pain. Enter the Medela Sleep Bra. At $19.99 you can't go wrong with this sports bra-ish bra. I say "ish" because it doesn't have anywhere near the support of a sports bra, but it just looks like one. It is very thin and soft, and does the job I need it to do, without cutting into my boobs like most nursing bras do. I don't even feel it on when I sleep, which is what I was most looking for in a sleeping bra.
2. First Years Milk Storage Organizer: As I just mentioned, I am "Moo-tilda" so I need some place to store my excess. This organizer does just that. Keeps the bags of milk flat and upright, and doesn't take up too much room in the freezer. As for bags I love the Medela ones that attach to the pump, but they are pricey so I switched to these byLansinoh.
3. APNO: Better known as All Purpose Nipple Ointment, this prescribed ointment is like the La Mer of nipple creams. At $75 for approximately 3 ounces, this turned pumping around for me. I had yeast build up in my nipples (I know TMI) that was making them red and irritated and making feeding and pumping terribly painful. My Lactation Consultant called in a prescription (with doctor approval) for this wonder cream and away the infection went. I use it after each pumping and feeding and it makes everything soft and pain-free. I am not sure if the cost is due to my crappy insurance or not, but I do know that each batch is hand made when you order it, so that might have something to do with it. Either way, it is worth EVERY penny.
4. Carter's baby clothing: When I found out I was pregnant I went out and bought a bunch of baby girl clothes: short sleeved onesies, little dresses, and other impractical things for a newborn, but what the hell did I know! For the past 4 weeks, my daughter has lived in Carter's baby clothing. Especially the one pieces with the feet. Her little feet are too small for any socks, so these are perfect. Plus, it is 20 degrees outside! What was I thinking with the short sleeves? You can always find these on sale somewhere, be it Babies R Us, Target, JC Penny, Kohls or you can visit there fabulous outlet store in Wrentham. They are cheap, they wash up just fine, and you don't mind if your baby spits up on them, unlike the Ralph Lauren clothing she has hanging in her closet that she will most likely not wear while she fits them. So much for my fancy baby!
5. Things we stole from the hospital: OK, so we didn't steal all of these, they offer them to you, but I think we took more than alloted...and thank god! The first item is the white asymmetrical tops they put on your baby. For the first week or so at home, Marlo lived in these (whether solo or under Carter's gear)- wrapped in my second favorite item, the hospital blanket. My husband was obsessed with these for some reason, so we have about 15 of them. They are perfect for swaddling your little one before they can fit into any swaddling sacks. And finally the Nasal Aspirator Bulb-thing. I lived with this by my side for the first two weeks Marlo was at home (I got sick, therefore she was sick too and you can't blow a babies nose!). That was, until my dog got ahold of it and chewed off the pointy end (I should say she did this the two we brought home from the hospital). It is terribly gross, but so satisfying to suck out baby snot. HA! I have yet to find one of that size and quality in stores, so if you can get your hands on one, put it in a safe place!
6. My iPhone and holder: It gets lonely and boring to pump in the nursery for 15 minutes 8 times a day. My iPhone has become my new best friend. I just place it in the trusty holder (which about two years ago I was planning to invent and become a millionaire, but little did I know someone beat me to it), and hook it on my glider and play one of the many games I have on there (Scrablle, WordWorm, and Monopoly as of late). I have also loaded it up with a fabulous mix of songs (Disney, Rock Lullabies, some Indigo Girls, Ray LaMontange, Ella Fitzgerald, and instrumental music from movies) and put it on speaker while I am rocking the little peanut to sleep.
7. My Dutalier Glider: This was one of many very generous gifts from my parents, and has certainly been put to good use. We feed Marlo at night in this, we rock her to sleep, I pump while sitting in it, and I even take naps in it sometimes. We got the one with the highest back and widest seat to accommodate my large bum and my husbands crazy long body. Some people say you don't need one of these, but it has been a blessing to have.
8. DVR: I took a 3 hour long nap yesterday at 3 PM, and could have easily slept until this morning. Needless to say I don't stay up and watch tv like I used to - I don't even stay up to watch the 7:30 Jeopardy some nights. So I thank God for my DVR, and thank God that episodes will be new again this week!
9. SKYPE: I put Skype on my computer years ago so that we could talk to my sister-in-law and her family in Spain. Other than that yearly phone call, we never used it, until Marlo came. For Christmas I gave my grandmothers webcams (one is in Dayton, the other in Denver), and got them set up on SKYPE so that they could "meet" Marlo. My parents have it at their house in Florida now...we can chat with my brother-in-law and his family in New Jersey, and my father-in-law in upstate New York. While none of our family lives within a 4 hour drive, they are now in our living room whenever we want! For free! Who would have thought my 86 year old grandma would live to see the day when she would meet her great granddaughter via a camera on a computer. It is just like Horizons at Epcot!!!
10. My Husband: I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I am the luckiest woman on the planet as I married the best man alive. I kid you not. Despite having to be told on occasion that it is OK to buy your wife flowers (even if she says she doesn't want anything for her birthday or Valentine's Day), he is seriously the perfect husband. And now he is the perfect father. It makes me want to cry when I see him with Marlo in his arms (she is so tiny and he is so big) - I catch him just staring at her sometimes in amazement and my heart leaps. I sometimes forget that he too had been waiting for her so long...And now that she is here he goes above and beyond the expectations I had for him as a father. He is first to go to her if she makes a noise, always wanting to feed her, has no problem changing her (both diapers and outfits), always wanting to hold her in his long arms...he even came upstairs the other day with a book in hand and told me that he felt like reading to his daughter. I thought I would melt! Even being back at work, he is willing to get up with her in the middle of the night to allow me to get sleep. He is always concerned about me getting enough sleep, or being healthy (I was really sick for over a week and now again feel like I am coming down with something) - both physically and mentally. He has also taken over dog-walking duties for the next few months so that "his ladies" can be warm at home inside. Every day when he leaves work I get a phone call asking if he needs to pick anything up, and without question he will run here and there to pick up food or anything else I ask before running home to see all his ladies. I don't, and will never, take him for granted, and know that I am lucky to have such a loving husband (and a hot one at that). Sorry I got all shmoopy on you :)

Breastfeeding Diaries: "Advice from a Pro!"

Before the baby is born:

*Take a breastfeeding class or read a book – just so you know the basics of how your body works – it really is amazing how the body makes exactly what the baby needs at the time. I think one really important point is that at the beginning the baby will constantly nurse but this is to stimulate your supply. If you start to supplement with formula early, then your body won’t produce enough and it will be harder down the road. Also a book will show you some basic positions to try out. (As an additional note, it is probably helpful for your partner to take the class or read the book with you just so he knows the basics too – that way he’ll be able to support you in the best way he can.)

*Buy 1-2 nursing bras or tanks – buy probably 1 cup size up from where you are near the end of your pregnancy. Don’t get too many as you won’t know how big the ladies will get once your milk comes in. Tanks are nice because they allow you to expose your boob while still hiding your belly rolls J

*Buy some breastfeeding cream – Lansinoh makes one as I’m sure other companies do. You want to have this stuff from the start before the damage can be done.

*Check with your health insurance. Some companies will pay for a breast pump or reimburse you for visits from a lactation consultant once the baby is born (see more info below).

*Pack your Boppy or My Breast Friend pillow for the hospital, if you plan to use one.

*Pack a nursing cover if you are going to care if your visitors (like your dad) see your boobs (surprisingly, I ended up not caring – I think I had bigger worries at that point!)

*Talk to your partner about your desire to breastfeed and the kind of support you’ll need from him. My husband, while trying to be helpful, kept suggesting that we get some formula. He had good intentions, as he saw how frustrated and upset and tired I was getting from breastfeeding. However, I didn’t want formula in the house because I didn’t want to be tempted to use it. If I had made this clear to him before I was in the middle of it, he wouldn’t have suggested it multiple times.

*Breast pump. If you plan to nurse for the long haul and plan to be away from your baby at all (work, pleasure, etc) you’ll need a quality pump. If you are unsure if you plan to continue breastfeeding you may want to rent one to see how it pans out before buying one. We bought one at the hospital and it was nice because the lactation person showed us exactly how to use it. They’re scary looking but once you get the hang of it, not bad at all!

*Get in the mind set that it might be hard! For some people it isn’t but I think for many people it is really tough, particularly at the beginning when you are recovering from delivery. I think knowing that it is hard, but it does get much better fairly quickly, helps when you feel like quitting!

At the hospital:

*When you are getting checked into labor and delivery, they will likely ask you if you plan to breastfeed. We made sure that they wouldn’t give the baby a pacifier in the nursery because we had read that it can interfere with latching.

*Most things I read said that it is important for the baby to begin nursing as soon after birth as possible (even if they really aren’t eating anything). I think I nursed probably within an hour of him being born. If this is something you want to do, mention it to the nurses so they can make sure it happens.

*Ask for help and take advantage of any services offered. Many hospitals have daily breastfeeding classes for new moms on the postpartum floors. I had the lactation consultant come in and help too. The nurses can also be quite helpful.

*However…Try not to get frustrated from all the advice. While it was nice to have so many people want to help, I was given so many different (and sometimes contradictory) pieces of advice that I was left really confused.

*Try many different nursing positions to see which one works for you and your baby. You should have seen the pillow towers I built in the hospital to position him correctly. It would take me so long to pile up the pillows and then place him just so – know that this too will not go on forever – after a few weeks I didn’t need pillows any more….

At home:

*Know that your boobs will get huge, rock hard, and hot when your milk comes in!

*Accept that your one and only job in life will now be to feed this baby – at least for the first few weeks. You really will feel like you are nursing constantly (because you are!) The baby will likely need to eat every 2-3 hours (from the start of a session) – and it might take 45 minutes per session. So you really aren’t getting much of a break. Just remember, it won’t go on like that forever…

*Therefore, accept any and all help (and demand it from your husband). Your job is to feed the baby and recover from childbirth and sleep when you can. Therefore it is not your job to clean, cook, do laundry, entertain visitors (unless you want to), etc.

*Get a husband pillow. This thing was awesome and enabled me to really easily nurse while still in bed.

*On a related note, try to learn how to nurse while lying down on your side. It really is wonderful to not have to sit up in the middle of the night to nurse. (though I didn’t learn/attempt this position until he was probably 5 months old – not sure why).

*Drink lots of water!

*Set up a comfy nursing station both upstairs and downstairs (or in the places you’ll be during the day and night). Stock this place with the tv remote, books, magazines, snacks, nipple cream, chapstick, water…

*Have a lactation consultant come for a visit. The hospital or your pediatrician should be able to give you a recommendation. I had one come when my baby was one week old. Nursing was going ok at that point. I was having some pain, my nipples were a little blistered, and I just didn’t think he was latching on correctly. I was also worried about whether or not he was getting enough to eat. I had a lactation consultant come and it was wonderful for my piece of mind. I showed her what I was doing and she basically affirmed that I was doing great – and gave me a few pointers for improvement. Most lactation consultants also have a scale they can bring so you can get the baby weighed to make sure he/she is gaining weight. An added bonus – my health insurance reimbursed me for the visit (and would have reimbursed me for several more visits from her if I needed them).

*Decide when/if you’d like to introduce a bottle. Based on my reading, we gave him his first bottle at 3 weeks. We decided on this time frame because my research indicated that before this might cause some nipple confusion, but if you wait too long, the baby may reject the bottle in favor of the boob. Every baby is different but for us this worked – he takes the bottle or boob, whichever is offered.

*That’s not to say we didn’t have hiccups with the bottle/boob. At times, it would seem like he didn’t want a bottle. Then he’d go on a boob strike. I think it’s somewhat normal and in most cases, passes!

*Once you’ve got the feeding and pumping thing down, try to build a little freezer stash of milk. It’s nice to have some

Hospital: Reviews

The majority of our Mama’s delivered their bundles at Brigham & Women’s hospital, and has nothing but glowing reviews. A few of us delivered at Beth Israel, and one at MGH, and they too had a great experience:

“Beth Israel is awesome. They deliver about a tenth of the babies as Brigham’s so they have a smaller, personal feel. But they’ve obviously got the amenities of a larger hospital. However, pick your doctor/practice not your hospital – that is most important.” MAMA E

“Brigham’s: Loved it, great rooms, room service, good food, access to childrens if anything goes wrong.” MAMA L

“I delivered at Brigham and Women’s and had a wonderful experience. I had a big private room with cable, the food was actually good, and the nurses were great.” MAMA S

“Mass General – top notch service start to finish. Could have used more lactation support but could have been more demanding myself rather than passive.” MAMA C

Hospital: The Dirty Truth (words of wisdom)

No one can truly prepare you for the roller coaster ride of giving birth. No matter what kind of classes you take beforehand, you will be in for some surprises; the sheer pain, complications, the aftermath. Here are some first hand accounts of our Mama’s d-days:

“All that preregistering you do – it’s bull shit, you’ll do it all over again while on all fours because you can’t take the pain and it doesn’t matter how much you scream and swear, the anesthesiologist comes when they’re ready – especially at 2am…

It’s not the birth that sucks, it’s the contractions – the epidural birth is downright pleasant – TV, ice chips, everyone cheering you on… I supposedly had a back that “didn’t take well to epidurals” so they literally poked and prodded for two hours while my contractions came every 2 minutes – it was sheer hell…I had track marks up and down my spine and there probably wasn’t one person on that floor that didn’t hear me scream. Plus, husbands aren’t allowed in with you when you’re getting an epidural, so I didn’t have mine…

I asked a million times if I pooped but everyone said no – even though it felt like it the entire time. My advice: USE STOOL SOFTENER… I opted for the stool softener over Percocet everytime.” MAMA M

“You get over the fact very quickly that everyone is either looking at or touching your ladyland. Not everyone poops – but they’re totally on top of the situation. The placenta is the absolute grossest – husbands should look away. We still can’t eat pork loin because it reminds my husband of the placenta.” MAMA E

“It is important to know that any clothing that you bring for yourself with likely be bloody (it is amazing how much you bleed and for how long after vaginal delivery) and you will probably want to throw it away when you are done, so don’t bring any expensive frilly things unless you are willing to trash them.” MAMA S

“If you have a c-section you cannot get up for two days or so and it makes breastfeeding that much harder because you are in pain. You definitely need someone with you to help you shower, etc. There is no pooping with a c section J” MAMA L

“C-Section. Emergency. After my water broke...and I was laboring 28 hours it was decided I needed an emergency c. Then I had all sorts of complications after! They thought I had a heart attack!?! IT was an infection. Baby went to NICU for 48 hours for observation. During labor I vomited like crazy!! I had numbness in my shoulders. OH, the internal exams while in labor hurt like a bitch!!!!! It was like having a huge open womb be made larger. I drifted in and out of consciousness during labor after hour 18. You can't eat in labor, not that you are hungry, but you can't even have water. I begged for water in the recovery room. I said my heart was racing because I needed water, lol.” MAMA R

“It was a busy day when we were there and I believe someone was having more trouble delivering than I was so there were many times during active (pushing) labor that it was just me and my husband in the room –scary! But if it was me having the more difficult labor I would have been happy to see that I was getting the constant attention. We were fine, it was just not how we pictured it. My epidural wore off on one side twice, which was not fun because it made for more starts and stops in the labor process – guess it happens more often than you think

Had a c-section after many hours of labor. I was told to not try vaginal delivery again because my birth canal is too narrow – that was a bit disappointing because it was very unexpected. Next time the one thing I will ask for is to see the baby right when it is delivered – I never got to see that naked, yucky screaming baby that you envision yourself getting to see. I also had a terrible reaction after the c-section was done, uncontrollable whole body shaking, teeth chattering (more like hammering), nausea, dizziness, shivering – they gave me many drugs to try to stop it but in the end the only thing that worked was putting my new baby’s cheek against my own --- oddly everything stopped instantly, very weird and I wouldn’t believe it myself if there were not others there to witness it.” MAMA C

“The epidural is THAT good. But try to hold out just 1 contraction longer than you think you can before getting it to keep everything moving along. If you do get the epidural – DON’T push as hard as you possibly can. Try more like 60% (they tell you this in the class, but it is easy to forget). Relax for the contractions – don’t tense up. Obvious in advance, forgettable in the moment. “ MAMA A

“Don't bother bringing pajamas to the hospital. I bought several (cheap, nonetheless, from Target) but never wore them. You will be back and forth to the bathroom so many times in the 48 hours afterwards, that it is a nice little treat to have the hospital gown with the open back that you literally just have to sit down on the toilet and that's it. No messing with pulling the pants down or untying anything! I wasn't prepared for how sore my whole body would be, literally just moving my legs over to get out of the bed and walk 3 feet to the bathroom was painful. You will also be sore down there, so going to the bathroom (just peeing) is a big deal! Plus the fact that you are bleeding a huge amount (it is the worst those first few days afterwards) so you have these huge pads that you have to wear which are really gross and big and bulky. So, scrap the whole idea of having cute pj's to wear at the hospital. I bought my own (cheap ones) because I figured I didn't care if they got "messy" or anything, and that I would just throw them away afterwards, but honestly the ease of the hospital gown being open was just so much easier I didn't even use the pajamas I bought. One thing to definitely bring lots of is SOCKS. You don't want to walk around barefoot, so make sure to have lots of socks with you at the hospital.” MAMA P

“Make sure that you TAKE FULL ADVANTAGE of the nurses at the hospital. That is what they are there for! Ask them a million questions, and after you get a new nurse on duty, ask her all the same questions again! There is so much they can offer you, make sure you get all the information you can....because once you go home from the hospital, you are all on your own! You can't just pick up the phone next to your bed and dial 9. Ask them everything from tips on feeding the baby, how to burp them, how to diaper them, swaddling, bathing them, everything and anything you can think of! Take notes if you have to (you will be so overwhelmed with information off the bat, don't worry about feeling silly if you have a notebook and pen!) But definitely make use of having 24-hour "help" at your beck and call :)” MAMA P

Hospital: Baby Needs

Every one of our Mama’s said to take all the free baby supplies you can from hospital. They have the best swaddling blankets our Mama’s have seen, so hide some and ask for more! They should also supply you with diapers, wipes, formula, burp cloths, sterilizers, so be sure to take full advantage of the freebies. Our Mama’s that had c-sections wished they had their Boppy or Breast Friend with them at the hospital to make nursing easier. The only thing you really need for baby is an outfit for the ride home.

Hospital: Advice from nurses

You will be lucky if you see your doctor for more than 15 minutes when at the hospital. It is the nurses that run the show. We can’t stress this enough: Be nice to your nurses! Acknowledge how hard they work even if you don’t feel like it. The nicer you are to them, the better your time at the hospital will be. Here are some words of advice our Mama’s received from their nurses:

““Don’t be afraid for your first post-partum poop.” Seriously, after all the trauma down there, it seems really traumatic. It’s not, but take the Colace anyway.” MAMA E

“If you aren't in pain, it isn't time yet. The more pain, blood and discomfort you are in the closer you are to the baby's arrival.” MAMA R

“ “Take your time recovering” – especially if you have a c-section. Take the medicine as they prescribe at first because you don’t want to get behind.” MAMA C

Hospital: When to have guests?

It is, of course, totally up to you to decide when you feel ready to share your new bundle of joy with your family and friends. The insanity of the birthing experience might overwhelm you, and make you want some quality time with your husband and baby. Or you might still be on that epidural high and want to share in the moment with all of your loved ones. Keep in mind that you will be exhausted, so too many people might make you cranky. Your parents and in-laws will be itching to get their hands on your baby, but if you need your private time, be honest and let them know when they should leave.

“It was good guests came day 1 when I was on a delivery high and the tail end of an epidural – I basically spent all of day 2 and part of 3 crying because it just sucked, hurt, was frustrating, etc. My mom came the night/late afternoon of the day – much later than I had the baby – which was good…right after delivery you want a few hours of just you, your hubby and new baby to let it sink in. “ – MAMA M

“I didn’t really want friends. It was very overwhelming and my hormones were raging. I think it all depends on the person – some people want people there the whole time. You’re in post-partum for at least an hour after birth, so you can’t really have visitors right away.” – MAMA E

“I enjoyed the company at the hospital. There you have everything you need right at your fingertips and a nurse to answer any questions and the baby is sleeping all the time. It is a great time for guests. Having guests once I got home was another story.” – MAMA S

“My parents and my in-laws arrived before I gave birth. It was 30 hours, so needless to say they had some time. It was kind of nice to have company and also good (at times) for my husband to have support. But due to circumstances I was not as social as I would have imagined being in the hospital, and until the baby is born and you have started to recover you never know what that will be.” – MAMA R

“I was ready to see people once the baby was born, but only for a little while because after my long labor I was tired. There was a little pressure knowing they were there but I was happy to share the moment with them. A little more time alone right after would have been nice – you have to spend some time in the OR getting put back together (after a c-section) so I am sure the parents were ready after waiting all that time but I actually didn’t even get to hold the baby until I was back in the labor/delivery room myself.” – MAMA C

“My mom was there during the whole day, she left the room just as I was starting the delivery. I have the philosophy that unless you were there when the baby was conceived, you don't get to be in the room! She waited outside and came back in after the baby was born. I was totally fine having visitors (just close friends and family) - Most of our friends all came the following day, so I guess it was nice having that whole first day to ourselves to relax a little. I wouldn't have wanted lots of people there right after (except parents/immediate family). “ – MAMA P

Hospital: What To Bring?

Some of our Mama’s are low-maintenance, while others are on the high end of the maintenance spectrum. Wherever you fit, here is a compiled list of our must haves:

• Panty Liners: if you have a vaginal birth, you will be bleeding. The pads they have at the hospital are like putting a pillow in your underwear. Bring substantial, but comfortable ones with you
• Bathrobe & PJ’s: When people come to visit you absolutely do NOT want to be in that disgusting hospital gown. If for no other reason than because it has a tendency to spring open at the worst possible moments and honey, you may think you look slimmer now that the baby is out but, trust me, you’ve got a ways to go.
• Sweatshirt/Hoody
• Socks and slippers
• Going home clothes: something extremely comfortable but not very nice as you still might be bleeding a lot
• Nursing Pillow (if you are there for an extended period of time)
• “Soothies” for your boobs if you are considering breast feeding. Your nipples will be really sore at first and these silicone pads you put in the fridge are a lifesaver.
• Camera
• Laptop/Book – something to keep you occupied during the down time
• Car Seat
• Something for baby to wear home
• Toiletries for mom and dad
• Lip Balm: This is an absolute must. When you go into labor you are not able to drink anything all day, so it is nice to have something to keep your lips moist.
• Shampoo/Conditioner
• Face Wash
• Toothbrush/toothpaste