From Mama J, to certain parents at the Children's Museum today

To the father of the child who got bubble juice in his eyes,
You are lucky I didn't kick you in the balls. I was just trying to be kind, while your child's eyes were covered in soap and already red, and point you in the direction of the paper towels. There was no need to snap at me and exclaim "I know where they are" as I was just trying to help you out. Telling your son that "it is ok" over and over, while he is screaming in pain and his vision is impaired will not help the situation. As a mother who has experienced the exact situation, I was just trying to speed up the process of getting your son some sweet relief from his burning bubble covered eyes. No need to be a dick to the kind pregnant lady.

To the old Chinese grandmother of the two brats in the toddler area,
Pay attention to your out of control grandchildren. And teach your grandchildren how to behave around other kids. Your granddaughter literally punched my daughter in the stomach to get by her quicker, forcing M to fall backwards and start to cry. I tried to get her to realize she did something wrong, but your crazy granddaughter just ran away and plowed into other kids. Get her under control - you are lucky I didn't grab her by the arm and give her a talking to. And who I assume was her brother you were also "watching" - teach him you don't push kids down slides just because you have no patience to wait your turn. You shouldn't bring your kids to places like this if they are going to act like effing crazy people and hurt whomever gets in their way. Sitting there smiling, being totally oblivious to what they are doing is not good grand-parenting. Get off your ass and pay attention.

To the mother of the child who sat in the car driver seat in the toddler area for over 10 minutes,
There are unwritten rules that you need to be made aware of. If you are at a crowded museum, and children are waiting patiently for a turn on something - in this case, to sit and "drive" the car - your kid does not get to take his sweet ass time and play with it as long as he wants. The first time we waited patiently next to the car for our turn you told us "he is playing and will be done in a couple minutes." When we came back five minutes later, and your child was crying hysterically while still sitting in the same seat, you told my daughter "he is almost done, you just need to be patient..." it took every ounce of self control for me not to punch you in the face. Your kid does not get to take his time doing whatever he wants to do when there are 10 kids waiting to play with the same thing. He gets a minute or two, and then the next kid gets a turn - it is an unwritten law that apparently every other parent in the world knows except you.

Sincerely,
Mama J

I hate other people's kids

So now that I have your attention, let me explain the subject of this post so I don't offend all of you.

If I know you, and I know your kids, I don't hate your kids. And "hate" is really the wrong word hear...I should have called this post "I am annoyed by stranger's kids, when their parents aren't paying attention and letting them run around like assholes and be mean to my kid..." but that was too many characters for the title line.

Our last visit to the Children's Museum inspired this post. We were in the toddler area (which is for ages 3 and under) on a busy Saturday morning during the members only hours. I over hear this mother talking about the two "little" girls she has with her - one was 4 the other was 5. They were twice the size of most kids in the area. They are playing next to M in the arts n' crafts area of the room and they are throwing the shredded paper up in the air so that it is landing on M's head. I politely say "girls, let's try and keep the paper on the table so all the kids can play with it." And they leave our table and go to the second table and continue to make a complete mess of the area.

Some kid stole my train mom!!

So I grab M and we walk to the play-car that you can sit in and pretend to steer. M is enjoying herself for 10 seconds when the same aforementioned girls come and sit in the car next to her. I kid you not this is what went down:

5 year old girl: I want to drive
Me: Well, you have to wait your turn, she will be done soon.
5: I want to drive now.
Me: I'm sorry but she is driving now and then you can drive.
5: But I want to drive now.
Me: Well too bad.

At this point M in enamored by the giant girl sitting next to her so she reaches out her hand and waves and the girl swats her hand away and says "don't touch me!" and backs up. I looked at her and said "She was only trying to be nice to you. Where is your mother??"

I was so fired up that I just grabbed M and started telling her that other kids can be jerks, loud enough so hopefully this brat's mother could hear me. We then ventured over to the train table and just as we were playing with a train some other little brat came over and grabbed it from M's hand and walked away! It took every ounce of self control I had not to go over to that kid and push him over. And this time the mother was watching the whole time - and she even said "oh good, now you have a train let's go over here." WTF woman??? Did you not see my kid holding onto that train?

This all went down about 3 weeks ago, and just writing this makes me mad again. I do not have patience for absent minded parents or their a-hole kids at all. I don't understand how parents can just let their kids go crazy and not pay attention to their every move. Ok, not every move, but seriously get a grip on your children. M has such a sweet disposition that she doesn't know any better and seriously just wants to be friends with everyone. And I feel like all of my friend's kids are the same way. Maybe because all of my friends have good heads on their shoulders and are actually good parents.

So if you are at the Children's Museum and you steal my kids train again, I might "accidentally" trip your kid. Just saying is all... :)

I heart the Boston Children's Museum

My first experience at the Children's Museum was when Marlo was 2 months old, and she spent the entire time I was there (with friends who had 1 year olds and could enjoy it) snug as a bug in the Moby. It was a Saturday, it was chaos, and I wanted out ASAP. We tried again (with the same group of friends) in December, once she had turned 1, and was able to walk around with me holding her hands. And it was love at first sight.

E & M enjoying the train table

Last week we bought a family membership and we have been 3 times since! For just $125 you and three other people can go to the museum for free. Normally it costs anyone 1 year old and above (which I think is pretty crappy you have to pay for kids that young, but I digress) $12. I figured since we would be going practically every week, the membership would have paid for itself in just 5 visits.

Now, we aren't at the age where we can fully appreciate all the Museum has to offer, but we definitely get our monies worth. Marlo lights up and giggles with excitement as soon as we enter the toddler play area on the second floor. They have a giant train table that is the perfect height for her to sidle up to and ramps and stairs to go up and down. In the back corner they have a craft/project area where there is always something set up for the kids to explore - like sand boxes or water play. I think she just loves the fact that everything is her height!

On the Green Screen in Arthur's World

Peep's World is a place for kids (a little older and taller than Marlo, but we still go in and watch) to play in a flowing water trough, and experiment with shadows and light. They have a whole area dedicated to Arthur & Friends, which she is just starting to recognize from television. There is a "Construction Zone" where you can play with trucks on ramps, and the older kids can climb all sorts of things. In the Explorer's Zone you can play with bubbles, make golf balls go over big ramps and all sorts of other fun things.

J, M & E "driving" a car in
the toddler area

When it is meal time, there is a Lunch Room with large tables, and plenty of high chairs available, and it is attached to an Au Bon Pain that has an extensive children's menu.

And with the Membership you have access to the Museum during exclusive Member's Only hours which are 9-10 AM on Saturday and Sunday. This past weekend we went at 9:15 AM on Sunday and it was pretty empty, but as we were leaving at 10 AM (it was just the two of us and she was ready for a nap) there was a line out the door to get in! If you can avoid going during the weekends, I would, as it gets pretty chaotic pretty quickly.

As far as parking goes, it can be a little tricky. If you go early on the weekends, it is easy to find free street parking (especially on Sunday when you don't have to pay for meters). There are lots of metered spots on Seaport Blvd by the Federal Court House or on Congress St. During the week, and during peak weekend hours, it is a little harder, and much more expensive. If you are lucky enough to find street parking at a meter, remember they just upped the cost to $.25 per 12 minutes, so bring a stack of quarters with you! There are two lots near the museum that charge something like $6 per half hour, and are very tightly packed in. There is a small garage across from Flour (a cafe I highly recommend) that costs $12 for approximately 2 hours. If you can't find anything right near the Museum then there is a lot about 3 blocks away (on the corner of Congress & Boston Warf Rd.) that costs around $11 for 2 hours.

Other things you might want to know...there is a Bank of America ATM right down the street on Congress St., as well as a Dunkin Donuts right nextdoor.

So to sum up, the Children's Museum is a great place to go with your kids, and if you are going more than a couple times a year, a membership is definitely worth it. What you should do (like I did) is have another friend buy a membership to the Aquarium, and another to the Science Museum, and then bring each other to museums!