Wednesday, May 5, 2010
I Hope You Have One Just Like You One Day!!
We weren't always close, and I wasn't always this nice to her. In fact when I was little I used to throw "fits" and yell and scream at her that I hated her, and wanted to be put up for adoption. On more than one occasion I even packed my little pink Snoopy suitcase and threatened to runaway. I got as far as the front stoop. It got so bad that my mom used to come over to my head and feel for my "horns" because she thought I was the spawn of satan. And that brings us to the title of this post...
While watching an episode of Parenthood I was reminded of the way I terrorized my mother, basically from age 2-21. One of the story lines deals with a defiant teenager girl, and her mother says, "You know what the hardest part of being a mother is? Daughters."
Every time I look at my daughter's face I think, what an angel! This motherhood thing is so easy! We are going to best friends forever!! I know it is so silly to think something like that but we are at that point where everything I do makes her laugh, and just being in my arms makes her stop crying. If I just think for a moment that this child will some day grow up and think I am the worst person on earth, my heart just breaks.
Is she going to be an angel like my husband was as a child? Or a devil child like I was?
Is she going to lie to her parents? Is she going to break curfew? Want to date a boy at 15? Be mean to kids at school? Have a fake ID? Drink before she is 21? NOT MY BABY!!
Of course I know the road ahead of us will not be sunshines and rainbows if she is anything like I was as a child, but if we grow to have the relationship that my mom and I now have I will be incredibly happy and proud of myself and my daughter. I hope that someday we become the friends that my mom and I have become, even if we have some rough patches we need to go through to get to that happy ending.
And no matter what, she will always love me, and I will love her unconditionally, even if she does actually grow a set of horns.
Happy Mother's Day Mamas!!!